How come?
Scribing at 5:30 p.m. on 2003-06-15
Got up this morning, and even though today is Father's Day, my wife had a Honey-Do list for me ready and waiting. Bless her heart.
I pointed out that today was Father's Day. She pointed out that we didn't have children yet. Picky. Humpf. If you're gonna let little things like that stand in your way, you'll never get anywhere in life, is what I say.
Spent a bit of time this afternoon wandering around Diaryland and clicking on random links. There are some funny, scary, alarming people out there, boy.
Had an interesting conversation with a friend of mine the other day, and was thinking about it this afternoon on and off. We were talking about the way people react to my wife and I when they first meet us; and how it is almost always a different reaction to the one before.
My wife is a black woman, and I'm yer run of the mill italian guy. Sometimes, for some odd reason, even when we're out doing 'married-type-things' like grocery shopping (not really something you'd do for fun with your friends, I don't think) for example, or showing up to register for something .. like, oh, say, our marriage license, people don't seem to immediately assume we're together. How weird is that? Men still hit on her, even if I'm standing right there with her. Women hit on me, even if I'm putting things in the grocery cart she's pushing. Things like that. And then we get the 'suprised' look; or the 'Oh. I. See.' look; or the 'huh! I've never seen anything like that before' look.
My wife and I talked before we went down south for her family reunion before we were married. I was going to 'meet the parents', get smoked over by the uncles, etc. and I knew it going in the front door. But having been raised in Detroit, with everyone crammed all up together, I never really thought much about it. My family has been antiracism activists for a couple of generations, and I have to say that even while coming from that background, I had some misconceptions (or true conceptions, depending on what side of the street you're on) about the South and it's reaction to interracial relationships.
I noticed that racism takes different forms down there from the forms it takes up here. Down there, we never had a problem being waited on in a store; and if someone had a problem with us, they were out and out verbal about it. Up here, if we happen into a store where the clerk has their own opinions about matters of that nature, we can stand at the counter all day, with said clerk struck apparently blind and deaf, at least when it comes to noticing we're waiting for service.
It ain't all good in the land o' sleet, and the big difference is down South, you KNOW who your enemies are. Up here, they may not say it to your face, but they let you know in other ways. It's a sneaky kinda prick-ish-ness rather than an in-your-face kind.
I've talked to grown adults who said they'd never SEEN a black/asian/hispanic/insert any other ethnicity other than pink here/ person until they were in their teens, or sometimes 20s, except on TV. How scary is that?
I dunno.
People worry me sometimes.
Why is who you love such a freakin big deal? Why do people seem to think they have a right to have an opinion (and express it) about your life when they don't even know you? Just curious.
For sure they wouldn't change the way they're livin if they knew you didn't like it .. so .. their opinion should matter WHY exactly?
And when you stop to think about it, with child abuse/murder for no reason/political prisoners/government sanctioned torture/the trashing of the environment/boneheaded uber patriots/dubyah in the whitehouse .. isn't there enough valid things to be honked off about?
Find a cause that matters. Quit worrying about whether people's skin tones match. We aint luggage, here, people.
Sheesh.
