Let's see what happens when I open the door THIS time!
Scribing at 9:21 a.m. on 2005-03-02
Well! Eventful couple of days.
My average on being able to get onto Dland and update is about the same as it’s been recently; ergo – about every 9th try I actually get in to post.
Was on my way out the door to the shop .. uh .. Saturday, I think it was. The mail had just arrived, and out of venal curiosity I stopped to check it. I never actually get mail; or if I do it’s only very rarely. I am just curious to see where the bills are coming from today.
Imagine my surprise when there was not one but two packages there with my name (or some variation thereof) on them. They were fairly small, and weren’t ticking, so I decided to take a moment and open them before I left.
Inside were the examples of DangerSpouse’s latest strange character twist. I know, if you read him, a strange character twist will not be a shocking concept for you; but this is one I haven’t been able to find in the books yet. So naturally my normal curiosity is piqued.
Considering his entry about doing the Technicolor Yawn all over his bathroom with a propulsion that would have made his Mighty Pink WRX green with envy, I was understandably hesitant about opening anything that had the return address of DangerHouse upon it. But I am a brave and not easily daunted soul, and being such, I pressed onward. Plus, it was pretty cold; so I figured anything inside would be preserved enough to fend off any potential reeking that could reasonably occur.
Now to the strange character twist part of our story.
DangerSpouse has this perverse thing for my wife. That’s right; he has unwholesome intentions towards the Diva. And in a bizarre twist of behavioral science, he has chosen to act this out by pelting me with trumpets. And the occasional flute. He put together a fascinating array of wind instruments to assail me … and sent me disc upon disc of .. yes. You saw it coming .. Classical music. But I am aware of his evil plan .. to break down my mental state until I am no threat to him and his heinous plan to usurp my rightful place with the Diva and (hopefully, I’m sure) get me committed by chucking Classical Music at me until I pop an important neuron. It’s a clever ploy, I must admit. There will be no fingerprints, nor will there be any physical evidence beyond the innocuous looking CDs by the time I am raving mad.
*wagging fist in the general direction of DangerHouse*
Curse you, DangerSpouse! Your evil plan will never come to fruition!
*countering the Classical strains playing in the background by running to another sound system and queuing up the Abba he previously sent me*
In other news, Nimiiwin forged out across the frozen tundra to come and visit the House of Gnomad. We like Nimiiwin, since unlike DangerSpouse she isn’t trying to drive me insane leaving no evidence. Plus, she brought me a very cushy blanket she made, with animals on it. It was cool. She hung out with us for the Latest Great Midwestern StormFront, and even though both she and the Diva seemed to think it was a really good idea to attempt to turn me into The Only Living Straight Male Hairdresser In The United States And Possibly Canada, it was still very nice to see her.
And she’s lots of fun when you get her tanked, too. Not that we did. Of course. We wouldn’t do such a thing.
Yeah.
So, cool!
